Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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