shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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