I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize