I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Randomize
