Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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