Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
