So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
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