just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
