Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
