Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize