God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize
