She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
