Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
