I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
