Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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