So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Randomize