you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
