I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Shame is for Republicans.
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