looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize