Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
