We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize