Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize