i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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