hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Randomize
