I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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