in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Someone shattered a urinal.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
