I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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