I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize