just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
