as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
The ass gains better be worth it
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
