Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
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