I wish life had little blips of pornography
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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