lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
