I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
