i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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