I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
