Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
he told me I talked like a deaf person
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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