he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Green mimosas i think yes
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Randomize
