GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize