she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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