We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
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