haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
