The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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