Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Randomize
