TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
