a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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