Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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