hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Randomize
