Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
