threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
